HOW TO SURVIVE A BRITISH CAMPING TRIP | WHAT TO PACK

HELLO MY ONLY HOLIDAY OF THE YEAR.

Yes, that’s right, my only holiday this summer is one of the camping variety. Appaz. buying a property and booking holidays abroad don’t mix. So I’m embracing the British countryside and becoming ‘one with nature’ over the next week. Joy.

In fact, by the time you read this I will probably be sprawled out on the grass in Wallingford (Oxfordshire) reading a book and pretending I’m in Greece. So here’s what I’m packing for this extremely exciting trip…

Sun cream. A gal can dream right? I’m praying for pure sunshine so I can get my tan on. It’s not a completely ridiculous idea, it could happen. And if it rains, then we’ll sit under a gazebo getting horribly drunk playing cards. But we’ll keep our fingers crossed for blistering heat.

ALL the beauty products. There is no excuse not to be ‘HD Ready’ whilst your camping right? When I go camping, I like to pretend I’m actually going on some exclusive spa trip, to an ‘au natural’ resort, where there will be lots of body scrubbing and cocktails to be drunk. The reality is that I pack the majority of my case with lotions and anything that might make my skin look glowy and try ’em all out in all that spare time I have sitting on a field. I really do live the life.

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Cheese & wine. When you’re stuck on a field with nothing to do but take photos of birds, then the only answer is to scoff different varieties of cheese and sip on cool crisp wine. I do tend to spend my camping trips in a cheese coma and alcoholic haze.

Welly boots and cagoule. Prepare for all the weather. I was once caught in a terrible hail storm on a camping trip, so y’know, I know my stuff. I’m a bit like Bear Grills, but I smell nicer.  Rain got nothing on me. Maxwell and I  even have seriously cool matching rain ponchos (uh huh, cool cats). So yeah,  come at me weather.

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A double duvet. Forget sleeping bags, it’s a double duvet all the way. This makes for the cosiest tent experience. You could practically be at home in your own bed. I mean, if it wasn’t for the wildlife sounds, your slowly deflating blow up mattress and the burning heat in the tent come morning. But yeah, a double duvet gives a ‘lil home comfort.

Head torch. Okay, so not the most stylish accessory one can wear on their head, but for practicality reasons it’s a must have. Need the loo in the night? Then you’re gonna need one of these bad boys. And Max forked out on this adorable lion shaped one for me this year. Boy, he sure knows how to treat a gal.

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Layers. I’m packing clothes that can be layered up so I can cater for any weather. Actually, scrap that. I’m just packing a hell of a lot of clothes. I can’t help it, I start packing sensibly but before long I end up with a case that’s overflowing with clothes for every occasion. Vest tops, check. Jeans, check. Sweatshirts, check. Prom dress, check. Wait what?

My whole nail polish collection. I am going to paint my nails a different colour every day that I’m there. I have a lot of time on my hands, and quite frankly I find applying nail polish relaxing.

Your hunter gatherer. Um so as you can probably tell, I don’t pack the most practical camping equipment, that is looked after by my hunter gatherer. ie, Maxwell. He packs all the stuff that will actually help us survive this holiday – tent, cooking equipment, heaters, candles etc. The list is endless. You should see his car. It’s like a massive game of Tetris. He really is quite talented.

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Giant garden jenga. Because what else would you want to play after a days drinking session? In fact, just pack a whole host of games. Cards, monopoly, hoopla, rounders bat, bat & ball. You get the gist.

Seriously comfy PJs. I always like to purchase new PJs for camping because people tend to see them a lot more than regular PJ wearing sessions. Don’t want to be caught short in mismatch PJ’s trotting to the toilet to brush my teeth or sipping a cuppa tea in the morning. I just picked up these cuties from New Look for £12.99. If you read about my egg eating habits here, then you’ll know that these PJ’s suit me down to the ground.

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First Aid Kit. I’m going camping with some men who like to play with knives and climb trees and make fires and jump off bridges into rivers. It’s inevitable that someone will hurt themselves this holiday. FYI, men are silly. Plasters are packed.

A power source. God forbid if I had to be cut off from power for a full week. No worries though, I’ll be hooked up to some electricity which gives me access to all the powered goodies that make my world go round. Fridge, phone, ipad, lights… some would say I’m not doing this whole camping thang properly. Others would say we’re doing it in style.

2 Comments

  1. Jane
    20th July 2015 / 7:30 pm

    A very entertaining read, doesn’t sound as though you’ll be struggling too much to survive, you take ‘glamping’ to a new level. I’m only guessing but I’m presuming you never did the brownie thing or DoE survival treks, or perhaps you did & never want to experience anything like it again! very enjoyable-J xx

  2. Pam
    21st July 2015 / 5:37 am

    ….this had dad chuckling over his breakfast this morning!! Xx